how to find soulmate???
Part One: Dating
1
Try internet dating.
Modern man has taken to the internet for expertise, shopping, and — now
— dating. More and more people today are finding their soulmates
online, and doing so quickly and effectively. Online dating can be
fruitful if you put in time and follow a few simple steps:
2
Get yourself out there.
If you expect to find your soulmate at some point, chances are you're
going to have to take part in the exciting activity known as dating. No,
you're not alone; yes, it can be hassle, and occasionally more than
disappointing. But dating can take a lot of forms, and with a little bit
of confidence, self-respect, and creativity, can help you find the
person of your dreams.
- Ask your friends if they know anyone who might be a good fit for
you. Your friends spend a lot of time with you and understand your likes
and dislikes by now. Trust them to set you up with someone they feel is
a good match. If you don't hit it off, have the confidence to bounce
back, stay on good terms with your date, and not blame your friend.
- Attend functions, socials, and reunions. Have that out-of-town
seminar looming? Look at it as a chance to meet someone in the same
profession and maybe hit it off. The world works in mysterious ways; the
more you attend events that interest you or involve your profession,
the higher your chances for meeting that special someone will be.
- Make your public profile interesting, engaging, and honest.
Remember, this is what people will first digest when they look at your
profile. If you take the time to add interesting details about who you
are and where you've come from, what you like and what you find funny,
chances are right sort of people will respond to that. If you're
dishonest in your profile, the people you meet in person will eventually
figure things out and probably won't respond well.
- Make a genuine effort to reach out to people. Send interesting
people messages, and take the time to craft an engaging message. "I
noticed you're in the auto industry, what do you think of this new car
model?" is much likelier to elicit a response than "Hey, what's up?"
- When you decide to meet your date in person, pick a public place and
keep the first date short. A public place means your date will feel
safe and in a social environment. Even if your date is going really
well, beg off after an hour and leave time for successive dates. You'll
get many chances to feel more comfortable with the individual, and you
won't risk exhausting things to talk about on the first date.
3
Don't keep making the same mistakes.
Dating is tough. Finding that person — much less that soulmate — who we
feel understands us perfectly and meets all of our needs can take
years. That's why it's important to keep growing as we date, and learn
from our dating mistakes.
- Don't put yourself in abusive relationships. An abusive relationship
will cause you to lose trust in other people, blame yourself for other
people's problems, and fall into an attitude of despair. Respect your
own dignity and leave relationships in which your partner threatens you,
insults you, becomes addicted to drugs, or manipulates you to get what
they want. Seek a relationship expert or other professional if you
suspect that you might be in an abusive relationship.
- Don't fall back in with the same person you've dated and broken up
with six or seven times. Psychologists say that we fall back into
relationships with people we've broken up with because of comfort and
familiarity: we don't have to start all over again and we know a lot
already about the other person. Well, there's a reason you've broken up
seven times. Probably more than one. Contrary to what they might say,
your relationship probably won't change. Break the cycle and go looking
for a new adventure!
- Accept people for who they are, not who you want them to be. You've
got all these fantasies flying around in your head about how wonderful
and special your soulmate will be, and it can be easy to project those
specific characteristics and features in anyone you get involved with.
Unrealistic expectations can ruin a relationship, and might even chase
your soulmate away. Whoever your soulmate may be, appreciate their
individuality and trust that if this person is your soulmate, they'll
never need to change who they are for you, just like you'll never need
to change who you are for them.
Part Two: Self-Improvement
1
Focus your mind.
It's no secret that we're attracted to people who make us laugh, cause
us to think, and are generally enthusiastic about the world. We love
these people because they're interesting, smart, and passionate. In
order to appeal to your soulmate, you can always improve your intellect,
no matter where you stand.
- Start learning about what interests you. So you like steam engines,
or fashion, or psychology. Take a dive into the deep end and really
study that subject you've been meaning to know more about. You don't
have to be an expert, but being able to talk about interesting tidbits
and crazy connections is appealing to other people and enhances your
rich inner life.
- Take the time to travel. You don't need to travel to Venice or
Botswana if you don't have the dough or inclination; a quick weekender
to that deserted ghost town or quaint city nearby will certainly do.
Traveling teaches you about different cultures and enlarges your
perspective on life. It also doesn't hurt when it comes to meeting new,
potentially fateful, people!
- Engage in debate and discussion. Debate and discussion, at local
meetings, bars, or even coffee shops, will hone your ability to think
critically and speak publicly. It will also help you become an anchor of
your community. Be civil, thoughtful, and don't let your pride get in
the way. Do not bully anyone with a different perspective into the
ground! Your goal is to learn and share, not "win" the debate.
2
Hone your body. It's
also no secret that physical attraction matters to potential soulmates,
although probably not as much as personality and mental spark. Getting
in shape and grooming your body so it looks its best is an important
step in attracting the person who will love you.
- Join your local gym or "Y." The goal here isn't to look like Tyra
Banks or Bradley Cooper; it's to look like the best version of you, no
matter who that is, and to feel energized along the way. Exercising even
20 minutes a day will improve your health, decrease stress, and
increase longevity.
- Pay attention to what you eat. We all have our guilty pleasures when
it comes to food, and that's perfectly acceptable. But what we put into
our bodies does have an effect on how we look. Try to
incorporate fruits, vegetables, as well as whole grains into your diet,
and drink lots of water. You'll look better, feel better, and have more
energy during the day. If you need help devising an action plan for
weight-loss, consult a nutritionist or doctor.
- Pay attention to the way you look. Some people think that grooming
is a waste of time. While it may not be the most important ritual in
life, it's probably pretty important to your soulmate. So do your
soulmate a favor: bathe regularly, groom your mug, and dress in clothes
that flatter you. Your soulmate will thank you.
3
Express your individuality.
Focus on the things that make you a wonderful human being. This step is
all about following your own inner voice and conscience. Do what you
want to do — within reason — and don't make any apologies for being
yourself. Your soulmate will be drawn to who you are deep down inside.
- Find out who you are. Some people are born knowing who they are, and
others have to go on a journey of self-discovery. Whichever is the case
for you, it's a good idea to right your own ship before you deal with
someone else's. Find out what's important to you, what you believe in,
what you like and what you dislike. Knowing these things will ultimately
give you a lot of tools to find your soulmate.
- Reward yourself by doing the things you really want to do. If you
get a kick out of cycling, take time after work to get on your bike and
barrel down those roads. There's a good chance that your soulmate will
share a lot of your interests. Who knows? Maybe you'll meet them along
the way.
- Create art. You don't have to be an artist to create art. Art is
self-expression at its barest. Art can be writing faithfully in your
journal or blog, making ceramics or pottery, or building miniature
models of ships. Whatever form of art you choose, put your body and soul
into its creation, and don't be afraid to show it to other people.
Part Three: Attitude
1
Expect the unexpected.
If you're expecting your soulmate to be love at first sight, you might
never find what you're looking for. So cultivate a sense of
improvisation, and take pleasure in the unexpected.
- Keep an open mind.
People have an uncanny ability to surprise you if you give them time.
Remember the old idiom: "Things aren't always as they seem." Be open to
new opportunities, new places, and most importantly, new people. Part of
the romance of having a soulmate is being pleasantly surprised. Who
knows, you might even learn a few thing along the way!
- When you meet someone who has soulmate potential, don't get carried
away. It's so easy to get lost in fantasies of how awesome your
relationship might be, because with those fantasies come high
expectations, and sometimes expectations are unrealistic! Make it a
point to remind yourself that this new person is human, which means
they're not perfect. They will make mistakes, and you need to be ready
to cope and forgive, rather than act shocked that the person dares to be
anything but perfect.
- Weather the storms. Contrary to what popular media would have you
believe, meeting your soulmate doesn't guarantee you a "happily ever
after." Things won't necessarily get easier when you find that special
someone. In fact, things might get even harder. Ultimately, a soulmate
is someone you can grow with, and the only way to grow together is to
face challenges together. So put your heart and soul into a
relationship, and stick with it through the ups and downs, even when you
question whether it's meant to be. When you're old and content, you
might look back and realize that you were with your soulmate all along.
2
Be patient.
Fate doesn't work on a schedule. Your soulmate might cross paths with
you when you're 8 or 80 years old. You might look forward to spending
the majority of your life with your soulmate — perhaps buying a house,
getting married, starting a family — but it may or may not be in the
cards. One bittersweet lesson of life is that we don't know until we
know.
- If there's only one person in the world who can be your soulmate,
what are the chances that she'll live in your town, look like the people
you grew up with, or even speak the same language? It might be pretty
slim. Broaden your horizons; your treat to yourself is that you have so
many different people and places to explore!
- A soulmate isn't always a lifemate. Your soulmate will color your
world no matter how old you are, so don't rush into things. Let things
take their course. Don't be so eager to find a soulmate that you end up
forcing the wrong person into the soulmate box, causing pain for
everyone involved. The love you get from your soulmate is strong,
effortless, and timeless.
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